It's not about strippers and booze. Bachelor and Bachelorette bashes are real games and can be great fun.

It is a western ritual that's here to stay. Yes Sir, throwing a wedding reception and a cocktail party isn't enough anymore. For those who know, the bachelor party is as integral a part of the wedding process as perhaps the sangeet ceremony. Increasingly, grooms, with their group of good friends are going in for fun and games before the seriousness of the various ceremonies come in.

But wait a minute. It's the age of gender equality. So bachelorette parties are also in, and sometimes they are more naughty and brave as that of their counterparts.

So here's your list of bachelor party to-dos. And we have great ideas for an unforgettable girls' night out too.

THE GUEST LIST
The bachelor party began as a gentlemen's party. A civilized evening of drawing room drinking, smoking, and toasting to the bride's health. Boy, have things changed! While most of today's bachelor parties have ditched the civilized bit in favor of a raunchy night on the town, the list of attendees has stayed the same. A close friend of the groom throws the shindig and invites friends and relatives of the groom, usually male-only.

In the case of the bachelorette - it is thrown by a female friend of the bride or the bride herself.

PICK THE LOCATION
You can throw your stag party almost anywhere. The typical bachelor party usually involves some combination of the following: booze and gambling (maybe not in that order). But, the trend these days is toward old-fashioned guyness - a weekend spent bonding in the woods, for example. Others plan high-adrenaline adventures such as white-water rafting, skydiving, or rock climbing.

Tamer bachelor parties might involve a weekend in Kathmandu gambling, a round of cricket, or golf if you happen to have admission to the links, and a nice tandoori dinner or a fancy night at a cigar bar. Of course, weekend trips involve travel and related expenses. If time is of the essence or all parties involved are on a budget, then a local bar, a hotel room, or somebody's apartment are fine bachelor party locales.

Budget restaurants, discotheques that can be got exclusively for the occasion are quite popular where bachelorettes are concerned. Basically, the girls just need a place to let down their hair in safety. The last thing they want is to have peeping toms and other perverts leering at so many women in so little clothing. Host the party at a safe and exclusive nightclub, ensure that you have a good DJ, get a person to help out with interesting mocktails and cocktails and have a blast!

Booking a mini-movie theatre is another good idea. You can catch a funny flick or even a nonsensical Govinda comedy, giggle a lot over bushels of caramelised popcorn and guzzle the colas forgetting all about the calories in them.

If you're less inclined to step out, then consider having a mad pajama/nightie party with sinful chocolate cake, pizza and a massive bowl of fruit punch. To add to the fun, you can even consider hiring a wide-screen TV with a DVD player and catch a great flick.

TIME IT RIGHT
If you think the night before the wedding is the perfect time for a bachelor/bachelorette bash, think again. The last thing Mr. Nervous Groom and Ms. Tremulous Bride need on the big day is a hangover. Besides, a big night on the town before the bride's big day will surely stress her out.

You should schedule the main event up to a month before the wedding and, at the very least, schedule it a week in advance, preferably on the weekend. Some people from out of town won't be able to attend, but if they do want to show up they can use the advance notice to make plans. Be sure to send out invitations or call invitees at least three weeks before the party. This way, you'll be able to avoid scheduling conflicts.

THINK ABOUT IT
Hey, the bachelor party is all about the groom. So, avoid any mishaps and use your head. The same goes for those hosting a bachelorette for the bride. Make sure people don't drive home drunk.

Hire a car service for the night, have a designated driver, or make sure everyone takes a cab home. Bring along enough money to get everyone home safely.

Be sneaky if you want:
Get together with the other groomsmen/bridesmaids and come up with an ingenious plan to surprise the groom/bride. But don't go overboard. Some people love to humiliate and tease the subject at the bachelor/ bachelorette party; for example, they get the groom drunk, take incriminating photos of him, or shave off all his chest hair. Whether or not you get involved in these antics is entirely up to you, but when the groom or the bride says "Stop," it means stop.


Be creative: Getting sozzled may seem like fun, but a weekend of white-water rafting may be more memorable in the long run. Or you could organize an evening of bowling for all. Bowling and belgium fries - sure to go down well with your bachelor/bachelorette party.

If you are really plush, you could have the party at a resort and treat your friends to an invigorating sauna-jacuzzi-and-massage session. This is brilliant for a bachelorette because there's no danger of stuffing face or having a hangover. So you don't feel bloated or puffy-eyed. On the contrary, this is one party from which you emerge glowing and rejuvenated.

Important memory-jogger: Don't forget the camera.